Sunday, December 27, 2009

Memory Scanner Anyone?

One of my oldest and dearest friends just spent the night at our house with her fiancee on her way up from Atlanta to Buffalo. Our story is an interesting one in that we went to school together when we were in middle school, she moved away to Atlanta, I was put in foster care and moved to a new city, and we lost touch.... but missed each other a lot and tried to find each other every now and then.

Thanks to the internet I had a clue about where she was, although no way to find her. Then... all of a sudden she found me! It was like being reunited with a long lost sister, totally picked up right where we left off, and all is well again in the world.

The problem though is that my dear friend is a piece of a childhood that is not only better forgotten, but for the most part really IS forgotten. Sure there are bits and pieces... mostly good and almost all of it is of my school and the friends that not only took me into their homes many times but made me part of their family. I have bits and pieces as well from periods of time when I was living with my grandparents, but for the most part prior to me being put in foster care is a huge void.

Yesterday this awesome friend gave me an envelope full of photos. Photos from birthday parties, 8th grade graduation, trips together. I see myself in them, totally awkward with awful glasses and a huge smile.... but that is it. It is like looking at a photo that I was Photoshopped into... awful because I can't remember ANYTHING about those moments. Sigh... and unfortunatly I feel like that a lot when I talk with her about that period in my life. I feel silly because this good friend of mine tried so hard to save me from becoming part of the foster care system and I have to ask her to remind me of the simplest of details.

I know that there is probably a good reason that that period in my life is a void... but it is frustrating because I want to remember more of those good times. I am just thankful that I get to make new happy memories with her and that I have her back in my life. (Love you lots Miss H!)

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